Good Laugh

I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for
my dogs and was in line to check out. A woman behind
me asked if I had a dog........Duh!

I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her
no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I
probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the
hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds
before I awakened in an intensive care unit with
tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in
both arms. Her eyes about bugged out of her head.

I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she
was totally buying it. I told her that it was an
easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is
to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets
and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.

The package said the food is nutritionally complete so
I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in
the line was by now enthralled with my story,
particularly a tall guy behind her.

Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food
had poisoned me and was that why I ended up in the
hospital.

I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking
my butt when a car hit me.

I thought the tall guy was going to have to be
carried out the door.