Retirement

And they ask why I like retirement....?????

Question: How many days in a Retiree week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday
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Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
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Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.
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Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.
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Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
Answer: The term comes with a 10% percent discount.
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Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?

Answer: Tied shoes.
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Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.
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Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire? Answer: NUTS!
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Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.
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Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal.
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Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answers: The never-ending Coffee Break.
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Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.