Thursday, September 10, 2009

Cows, Constitution, and the 10 Commandments

COWS


Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow,
born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington ?  And, they tracked her
calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million llegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give
each of them a cow..
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THE CONSTITUTION

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq
... Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really
smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore.
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THE 10 COMMANDMENTS
 
The reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse or Congress is this -- you cannot post
'Thou Shalt Not Steal'. 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and
politicians .... it creates a hostile work environment.
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Tuesday, September 08, 2009

A Good Argument - One I Stand By


This man makes  the best argument against the Obamacare program in less than four minutes than I've heard in four months of discourse.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Wedding test

THE WEDDING TEST

I was a very happy man.    My wonderful girlfriend

and I had been dating for over a year, and so we

decided to get married. There was only one

little thing bothering me...It was her beautiful

younger sister.


My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very

tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She

would regularly bend down when she was near

me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to

be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was

near anyone else.


One day her 'little' sister called and asked me to

come over to check the wedding invitations. She was

alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she

had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't

overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once

before I got married and committed my life to her sister.

Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.

She said, 'I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if

you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me.'


I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go

up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned

and made a beeline straight to the front door. I

opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.

Lord... and behold, my entire future family was standing

outside, all clapping!


With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and

said, 'We are very happy that you have passed our

little test. We couldn't ask for a better

man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.'

And the moral of this story is:  

Always keep your condoms in your car.
 
Have a fabulous day....

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Proud to be from West Virginia

After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, New York Scientists
found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the
conclusion, that their ancestors already had a telephone network more
than 100 years ago.
 
Not to be outdone by the New Yorkers, in the weeks that followed, a
California archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a
story in the LA Times read: 'California archaeologists, finding traces
of 200 year old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already
had an advanced high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier
than the New Yorkers.'
 
One week later, the Moundsville Daily Echo, a local newspaper in Moundsville WV
reported the following: After digging as deep as 30 feet in his pasture
near Proctor, Bubba Brown, a self-taught archaeologist reported
that he found absolutely nothing. Bubba has therefore concluded that 300
years ago WV had already gone wireless.

Just makes you proud to be from West Virginia, don't it?